Fake Green Grass

As Hubby gets packed to leave us for several months, and I swallow another round of pills to fight my condition, I keep asking myself, "Why are we getting put through this? Has God forgotten about us here???" We pray every night for people we know who are hurting, or who have new babies blooming in their lives and it makes me wonder if anyone is praying for us and if they are, why God isn't listening.

I remember as a child I thought God lived in our neighborhood. He lived in a white Capecod house with black shutters; most importantly, He had that plastic green grass on his front porch. Every single time we would go by that house I would say to myself, "Hi God, it's me again!" To my seven year old mind that was God's house.

Today I was driving home from having tea with some friends, one of which has lost her husband to a brain tumor in recent weeks. I thought again, as I navigated home, "Why has He forgotten her? Where is HE?!" I was pretty mad. I mean, I am no angel, but my husband going to war and me having Trigeminal Neuralgia is pretty brutal on the heart and mind.

As I drove along the same route I always take, there was a big yellow truck in front of me. One that I see occasionally in my neighborhood, and one that was driving as slow as can be. Normally I would fly down this road, but this truck was keeping me at a snail's pace. As I stared at the back of this truck, I started looking around me. To the left of me was a little gray house. On the front porch of this house was bright green plastic grass.

"God has moved down the street from me!" thought my seven year old self. But my thirty-five year old self thought, "Does that mean something? Or is it just a coincidence?" Oh, how I want to believe that God has moved for me. Oh how the mind of a seven year old wouldn't even question the appearance of bright green plastic grass.